Just another three days before I leave batu pahat. 3 nights of sleeps left.
My friends have been expressing their feelings about leaving batu pahat. most of them have mix feelings, i think most of them feel sad about this. Yea… coz this is where we finish our final year and we may not be seeing each other again after this. But, somehow of coz they are happy coz this mean that we r finishing our study…

what about me???

I dont know what to say.
i think i may conclude that my living here has actually made me feel;
~inadequate
~hopeless
~helpless
~lonesome
~over sensitive
and some other feelings which are indescribable.
I cant wait to leave. And I really pray that I wont have to come here again to stay for another 6 months. I wont be able to do that.

Maybe im juz being emotional while Im reading this, considering my estrogen level is at the lowest state of the cycle.

I do have some happy moments here. I tried to actually patched all the negative feelings with that memories. Yet, I have not been able to do so. Maybe my heart juz not belong to Batu Pahat.
Im sorry…

_NaNa_

what will u do when u feel sad, mad or happy?
hmm.. u might share it with ur family, friends or ur partner.
but maybe there are certain things that u wont share
certain things u may think there’s no use of letting people know
coz it wont make a difference

yea…
there is always this ONE thing i wont share
i dont know
its not like i really wont share
maybe i just prefer to keep it to myself
or maybe i still could not find the comfort after sharing this ONE thing

people wont understand
and even if i let them know
still there’s no use
coz that ONE thing cannot be brought back
and NOTHING could replace it

i guess i just have to live with this

dah lama saya tak update blog ni. maybe sebab saya buzy. emm. ye la tu. anyway, sekarang pun saya buzy sebab nak kena siapkan portfolio. tapi macam malas sekejap. hehe
just came back from a great holiday!
so, this coming day mesti rajin sangat-sangat. hopefully la. nanti Mr. Izmail marah!
this weekend pergi holiday with Mr. Izmail and his Mama, whom I call Mama too. ye la, coz I only hav Mak. Takde Mama lagi. hehe. adakah alasan macam ni?
We went to a place name Eagle Ranch. This place is set to be mini cowboy town. the accommodations semua ala-ala cowboy. so thus the employees there, cowboy style.
kalau ikutkan, eagle ranch ni takde natural tarikan sangat. its more to man made. but super creative! tak tahu la macam mana orang boleh terpikir nak set a very nice cowboy town as a tourist attraction. maybe kat oversea memang ada tempat ni jugak kot.
so, dekat sana u can do a lot of activities. if u came in group, u can do more la, macam jungle trekking, sea rafting, paintball..
what we did on saturday was canoeing where the canoe merata-rata je pergi n langgar-langgar tiang. haha
sambil canoeing, sambil nyanyi lagu wonderpet yg malay version tu ngan Mr. Izmail. klaka!
“apa yang penting? Kerjasama!!”
tapi Mama cakap, sorang ke sana, sorang ke sini. hahaha
then, go kart! our first time. dah lama Mr. Izmail nak try go kart. at last tercapai jugak impian dia. seronok. there will be second, third n seterusnya. mula2, saya drive slow2 je, coz takut. then laju sket. tapi tak laju sangat coz the steering wheel tu berat! im scared if laju, i cant control the direction. nevertheless, it was super fun!!
horse riding was also very nice. tak puas!! nak naik lagi.
ada few things lagi we all did, but then afternoon, we went to mandi pantai kat melaka. since eagle ranch memang already very near to malacca. we had a good time there. tapi, Mr. Izmail’s foor injured coz terlanggar batu masa swimming. kesian my love… hope, its better now.
it was a great holiday.
but the parting time was hard. sedih nak berpisah dengan Mama n Mr. Izmail.
its okay, i’ll c u n Mama in 2 weeks time. hehe.
thanx a lot to Mama for accepting me as part of the family, for the holiday and for everything…
Im so glad and thankful for given this chance. I wish this would last forever.
taknak thanx Mr. Izmail!