salam…
hye everybody! im so sorry for not updating this blog for months! huhu. i cant believe i havent been blogging these few months and there were a lot of things that happened. so many things!
to conclude, i have graduated medical school and am going to start being a government servant by tomorow. yep! tomorrow.
i have a cocktail of feelings in my heart, and thousands of butterflies in my tummy. haha. can u imagine wut kind of feelings im having right now?
whatever it is, i am praying to Allah, that He will make me a caring and competent doctor. Wish that i will be better and better. wish that i will always remember to improve myself and do the best.

insyaAllah, i will be updating again. see u guys, and have a good day, okay!

love,
Dr. Sajidah Yusrina Zaimi

Just another three days before I leave batu pahat. 3 nights of sleeps left.
My friends have been expressing their feelings about leaving batu pahat. most of them have mix feelings, i think most of them feel sad about this. Yea… coz this is where we finish our final year and we may not be seeing each other again after this. But, somehow of coz they are happy coz this mean that we r finishing our study…

what about me???

I dont know what to say.
i think i may conclude that my living here has actually made me feel;
~inadequate
~hopeless
~helpless
~lonesome
~over sensitive
and some other feelings which are indescribable.
I cant wait to leave. And I really pray that I wont have to come here again to stay for another 6 months. I wont be able to do that.

Maybe im juz being emotional while Im reading this, considering my estrogen level is at the lowest state of the cycle.

I do have some happy moments here. I tried to actually patched all the negative feelings with that memories. Yet, I have not been able to do so. Maybe my heart juz not belong to Batu Pahat.
Im sorry…

_NaNa_

what will u do when u feel sad, mad or happy?
hmm.. u might share it with ur family, friends or ur partner.
but maybe there are certain things that u wont share
certain things u may think there’s no use of letting people know
coz it wont make a difference

yea…
there is always this ONE thing i wont share
i dont know
its not like i really wont share
maybe i just prefer to keep it to myself
or maybe i still could not find the comfort after sharing this ONE thing

people wont understand
and even if i let them know
still there’s no use
coz that ONE thing cannot be brought back
and NOTHING could replace it

i guess i just have to live with this

dah lama saya tak update blog ni. maybe sebab saya buzy. emm. ye la tu. anyway, sekarang pun saya buzy sebab nak kena siapkan portfolio. tapi macam malas sekejap. hehe
just came back from a great holiday!
so, this coming day mesti rajin sangat-sangat. hopefully la. nanti Mr. Izmail marah!
this weekend pergi holiday with Mr. Izmail and his Mama, whom I call Mama too. ye la, coz I only hav Mak. Takde Mama lagi. hehe. adakah alasan macam ni?
We went to a place name Eagle Ranch. This place is set to be mini cowboy town. the accommodations semua ala-ala cowboy. so thus the employees there, cowboy style.
kalau ikutkan, eagle ranch ni takde natural tarikan sangat. its more to man made. but super creative! tak tahu la macam mana orang boleh terpikir nak set a very nice cowboy town as a tourist attraction. maybe kat oversea memang ada tempat ni jugak kot.
so, dekat sana u can do a lot of activities. if u came in group, u can do more la, macam jungle trekking, sea rafting, paintball..
what we did on saturday was canoeing where the canoe merata-rata je pergi n langgar-langgar tiang. haha
sambil canoeing, sambil nyanyi lagu wonderpet yg malay version tu ngan Mr. Izmail. klaka!
“apa yang penting? Kerjasama!!”
tapi Mama cakap, sorang ke sana, sorang ke sini. hahaha
then, go kart! our first time. dah lama Mr. Izmail nak try go kart. at last tercapai jugak impian dia. seronok. there will be second, third n seterusnya. mula2, saya drive slow2 je, coz takut. then laju sket. tapi tak laju sangat coz the steering wheel tu berat! im scared if laju, i cant control the direction. nevertheless, it was super fun!!
horse riding was also very nice. tak puas!! nak naik lagi.
ada few things lagi we all did, but then afternoon, we went to mandi pantai kat melaka. since eagle ranch memang already very near to malacca. we had a good time there. tapi, Mr. Izmail’s foor injured coz terlanggar batu masa swimming. kesian my love… hope, its better now.
it was a great holiday.
but the parting time was hard. sedih nak berpisah dengan Mama n Mr. Izmail.
its okay, i’ll c u n Mama in 2 weeks time. hehe.
thanx a lot to Mama for accepting me as part of the family, for the holiday and for everything…
Im so glad and thankful for given this chance. I wish this would last forever.
taknak thanx Mr. Izmail!

last sunday Mr. Izmail and me went to Alamanda, Putrajaya. It was actually a very last minute plan, since the initial plan was me finishing my paeds portfolio and Mr. Izmail have a good rest at home.
However, the fact that we were just an hour journey apart made it irresistible from seeing each other
(well, since memang dah few months pon we havent see each other, so u guys takleh comment, k. haha)
wut is it about ‘2 kings and 1 robin’ ?
emm
the first king is Sushi King. we ate sushi and tamaki at sushi king coz i have 3 RM 5 voucher (unfortunately only can use 1 per customer). but it was nice. eating sushi wif love one. i think it is kinda romantic.
(hmm.. dont know actually the link between romantic and sushi. lol)
anyway, after the first ‘king’ we went to solat maghrib. the surau was well congested coz its sunday! so it took some times to pray.
after prayer, we went to our second ‘king’. its Burger King!!!
i remember telling Mr. Izmail that i so love the whooper. eating this is also romantic. (err… byknyer romantic)
well… its romantic coz it reminds me of the one day when we head back to kl from penang. we dropped by at restoran jejantas, ate whooper while enjoying the highway scenery. it was super nice, ok!

err… if u feel nauseated reading this, plez close the window, k.
habis cerita 2 kings, then come la our ‘robin’ hood. which is actually baskin robin ice cream. indulgence is the word. love it tho!

ps; deary, today my friend gave me another 3 vouchers!! yayaya

today, isnt a good day for someone whom i love the most.
it must be a hard day.
i dont know. to what extent this day has affected you.
u must be feeling frustrated. disappointed. sad.
i am not sure what else are there coz my imagination is not good.

but, knowing that u r sad and not knowing how to help u is the saddest feeling i ever had.
i wish i could reach to u.
see u in front of me, so i could take care of u.
i’ll feel better if i could actually see u
even just for seconds

i dont know what do u want from me
hmm
u might dont wanna talk to me for a little while
or a little longer
but u know wut i want?

if it is possible, i want to hear u every seconds
i want u to not put me aside
i want u to let me know how could i help u
i want u to be here with me

i’ll do anything to be by your side at this moment

porty is nama manja untuk portfolio.
owh, it wasnt me who gave this name. its ching mun’s creative mind

anyway, why i want to talk about cik porty ni?

as usual, in every posting u must have 2 porty.
tomorrow, my fourth week will start and i havent had my second porty
haihhh
i was on call today. there were a few good candidates for porty. however, those candidates did not belong to my bed.
hati saya gatal je nak buat macam a few others did. clerked the case, n tell the owner of the bed;
‘hey, ive clerked the case. i hope u dont mind i took it since u werent here last night’
well well. its very hard to say no of course.

anyway, i had decided not to
as i am trying to prohibit myself from acting like others
because it is just wrong
n worst of me if i did the same, kan?

so, here i am. writing a blog instead of a porty

okay, just before i shut down this computer to rest my eyes on washington manual of surgery, i want to type in a new post. to actually announce that i finished reading a novel by Noa Roberts. Its “memory in death”
i’ll give 4 stars for this one. dont know why is it not 5. its superb tho.
i just super love it~~~

time to study

~~keep holding on

you guys must be sick of my blog
such a hopeless romantic
but not jiwang karat, okay?

this is for you, my dear~~

And I’ll be your cryin’ shoulder
I’ll be love`s suicide
And I’ll be better when I’m older
I’ll be the greatest fan of your life

i still miss you
but dont worry, i’ll hang in here and wait till your exam is over

~i miss u